I’ll do you like a truck. Wait. What?

I’m gona be honest with you, there are many things I wish I fucked like but a truck is not one of them. (we will get there in a moment but first I want to take a diversion). (Like I wish I fucked with the speed of the cheetah but the long distance endurance of an in shape human. Yeah thats right a Human.

Topical Olympic commentary. not sure about his ‘endurance’ But man is he beautiful to watch run.

Humans have the best long distance endurance of any animal on the planet as we can reach fast speeds with a relatively minimal amount of energy expenditure. Additionally we can expel excess heat through sweating and breathing whilst in motion where as many other animals are forced to pant (like a dog) to get rid of the excess heat, which is toats hard to do whilst moving at high speeds,

Think of it this way, an Arabian horse can run at like 35 mph for like four hours (granted your basically riding the horse to death.) where as human’s can run some say between 12-20 (though that seems REALLY fast to me) for up to 16 hours or even more. ABSURD. Thats like from my family home to NYC and back in a day. You know read this awesome science daily ARTICLE, it explores this humans as supper runner much more adroitly then I can. Apparently our thumb is not the only reason we are great)

I always assumed like dogs had the best endurance of any animal, but guess I was wrong. Just goes to show you how great googling things past your bedtime is.

Kangaroo’s also have great endurance, this one perhaps not. He looks well stoned.

Anyway. digression over.

So yeah If i had to choose something to fuck like It would be a cheetah human hybrid, or a really good thunderstorm. If I had to choose something inanimate to fuck like, perhaps a skyscrapper. THEY ARE BALLER.

BUT basically what i’m trying to say is i’ve never looked at a man and though ‘DAMN I wanna do him like a truck.’ like what does that mean. ‘come up from behind and tail gate him and then try to get past him when he’s feeling uncomfortable and a bit scared .’ Basically i uncovered this seminal music video “I’ll do you like a truck” by GeoDaSilva. (check out his website there is a link thats asks if you are “Sexy, Fizzy and Glittery.” I think he has people confused with cola drinks at gay pride.) and it’s got me thinking about a lot of things. Mainly, what if inside all of those trucks on the highway were actually soft core porn parties and I never knew it?


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