Gay Wedding Realness


The most fantastic of Husbands (Photo by the Extremely Lovely James PB you can find more of his work here: )

So I just went to this wedding and it turns out it was totally not only Life changing but probably altered the state of reality to come. The realization snuck up on me some where in the middle of the service. I was standing there, watching Nick and Julian, the Husbands to be eloquently weaving words into vows when threw my sobs a realization most glorious descended upon me.

On that day I was a conduit for full body convulsing tears as I watched two fantastic men, surrounded by the people they love, Wed. Oh it was a Wedding dressed in more riotous colors then the spectacle of Heaven must be painted with. It was so vibrantly hued that the sky even grayed out of respect, to give us all a blank canvas upon which to spread our selves as visions. There was so much love in that field, not just for the two men on their plinth of wooden trunks, (though much of it was for them) but for all those whom surrounded them. It was a web of love, an interconnected nodal structure that combined community, expression and desire into one potent and heady mixture.

Talk about a venue. HELLLO farm house realness

Talk about a venue. HELLLO farm house realness. (Photo by Shaft from The Fabulus of Unicorns: )

I have hardly ever been moved so in my entire life. (Maybe the first time I saw Judy sing Battle Hymn of the Republic sort of showed me that I was capable of such a depth of feeling) Nicholas and Julian, you two have moved far beyond inspirational to me, you are truly more iconic.

But back to the world altering realization, If you want an exact point, it was some where around the point where Nicholas started looking in the crowd for the person whose cell phone was softly playing music, (it was his own.) that I understood in a primal way that this, this occurring in front of me was the gay wedding everyone on the Right (From the overly religious straight through to the bizarrely political)  were worried about.

Lady Tamsin, one of the most beautiful people the world will ever meet. As well as a sensational Best Man

Lady Tamsin, one of the most beautiful people the world will ever meet. As well as a sensational Best Man

It must be.

It was so ferociously fabulous there is no way it has not altered the state of history, I’m sure people have heard tell of the coming of this wedding for ages, and that’s what prompted them to make artful banners, in block caps, campaigning against gay marriage.

I never really liked math that much anyway But bonus points for a great type face.

Demons… Really…

Because we all have a secret and let’s ADMIT IT. There is a GAY AGENDA and it’s to making everything GAY and fucking fabulous, and take antiquated systems of oppression and exclusion and radically transform and give them a make over. And this wedding, well, I’m pretty sure it was the Gay Agenda made manifest. It was on that hill, on that wedding day that we laid out our collective vision for a gay future, and OH IT IS GLORIOUS.


These are some of the most inspiring people I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. Look at them! I FUCKING LOVE ALL OF THEM. (Photo by Shaft from The Fabulus of Unicorns: )

I’m so sorry straight people. The transition into a FULL GAY WORLD, may be hard for you. Don’t worry, as a group we are pretty good about dealing with it, and this time there will be no one to oppress you because we will all be GAY. I for one am happy to help you deal with the emotions that come up. But don’t worry I’ll you really need to do is listen to Shirley Bassey’s Performance albumn and everything will be as right as rain. Gay rain.

(and here by gay I mean culturally gay, not just men who sleep with men. As far as care you can be a woman who wants to sleep with people of any gender and still call your self gay, because gay is a state of mind not a sex act. Gay at its best is love, and support, and sequins.)

(and yes I recognize that there are like a million definitions for gay and for me, presently in this moment I am defining gay as all those principles associated with Rainbows, and Sunbeams, Oscar Wilde and Neil Bartlett, Baby Jane, Judy, Cher, camp as a vacuous aesthetic, camp as an aesthetic brimming with substance, you know gay as happy and divine, Gay as freedom.)

(We could also have a conversation on weddings as form of patriarchal oppression or gay weddings and assimilations culture, or whatever, and I am happy to have those conversations with whom ever wants to, its just presently I want to revel in gay glory, which I have to say, is something I fear we don’t do enough. GAY CULTURE IS AWESOME. This wedding was AWESOME)


WHATTTTT inspiration for EVERYTHING. (Photo by James PB)

WHATTTTT inspiration for EVERYTHING. (Photo by James PB)

I imagine now pictures of the wedding will filter out into the world and then the great flood of change will be witness across the land. It shall, like all divine plagues come swiftly and with out warning. One moment, some poor un-expecting straight person is going to be sitting around doing the quintessentially straight thing of lets say having a meal, and the next think, BOOM just like that, it will be a full on gay meal. With two salad forks and a strictly speaking unnecessary number of small cups that look like some alchemical decanter set. I Imagine being that the change will be instantaneous to full blown gay, this man, lets call him Jim, Jimmy now, won’t mind. Perhaps there will be a moment of longing as he looks towards some heterosexists magazine that overly objectifies women, and realizes that what he really wants to be doing is having a good old ki-ki (rooted in I statements and feeling words) before going off to a fantastic club night with his fantastic friends, to have a fantastic time.

Thank you Nick and Julian for not only throwing an incredibly party, but for kick starting the Gay Agenda. AND OH WHAT A WEDDING IT WAS, Oh the dancing, the delights, the revelry, the connections, the conversations, the moments.

Romy, Sarah and I. Two of my most favorite people in the entire world. (Group Selfie by Sarah)

Romy, Sarah and I. Two of my most favorite people in the entire world. (Group Selfie by Sarah)

I’m sure I shall be thinking about this weekend for weeks. But for now, this is all I have to say. That and thank you to Katie Craig, for that dance with you to WHEN I THINK ABOUT YOU I TOUCH MYSELF, was life altering. Thanks for that unexpected primal scream therapy session.

Anyway, I’m off to be really butch and indulge myself in a hedonistic fashion.

Love you Nicholas and Julian, thanks for changing if not everyone’s at least my world.

WEDDING! (photo by James PB)

WEDDING! (photo by James PB)



3 thoughts on “Gay Wedding Realness

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